Yesterday, FIFA President Sepp Blatter admitted that awarding the 2022 World Cup to the host country Qatar was a mistake.
Speaking to Swiss channel RTS, the FIFA president said: “Of course, it was a mistake. You know, one makes a lot of mistakes in life.
Gee, Mr. President, you’re just figuring it out now.
Allow me to remind you of a satirical post I penned three years ago lampooning your decision at the time.
(Satire) On December 2, 2010, FIFA officially announced Qatar as host country of the 2022 World Cup.
FIFA’s surprising selection of this little known, oft-mispronounced Persian Gulf Emirate is cited as a “courageous step into new territory.”
Yea, kinda like intentionally marching right off the nearest cliff!
Despite Qatar’s location in a politically unstable region with no football (soccer) playing history and scorching desert heat that could melt an Adidas soccer ball, FIFA President Seth Blatter boldly proclaimed, “The World Cup will now go to new lands!”
The President’s confident comment prompted immediate worldwide reaction from incredulous soccer enthusiasts – many sarcastically suggesting that FIFA could also have chosen Mars – whose lunar landscape, extreme weather conditions and non-existent population base closely mirror that of the newly appointed 2022 host nation.
Nevertheless, FIFA’s daring decision to challenge conventional thinking by voting Qatar as the 2022 World Cup host immediately galvanized other audacious moves in the sports world; namely:
In Lausanne, Switzerland – International Olympic Committee President Jacques Bogge quickly named Honolulu, Hawaii over Annecy, France; Munich, Germany; and Pyeongchang, South Korea as host city of the 2018 Winter Olympic games. Bogge noted that Waikiki’s beautiful weather couldn’t be any warmer than what skiiers, bob sledders and skaters experienced at the 2010 Winter Games held in Vancouver, BC.
In New York City – NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell awarded Dhaka, Bangladesh as site of Super Bowl 55. Defending this newest venue, Goodell noted that despite knowing nothing about our uniquely American sport, the Third World country holds manufacturing rights to most of the NFL licensed apparel and certainly deserves a run as host city to the event.
In Charlotte, North Carolina – NASCAR officials announced a new Interstate 95 Race as part of its Spring Cup series. NASCAR President Mike Helton boasted that the Interstate’s well established infrastructure up and down the eastern seaboard would allow increased visibility for the sport while showcasing the excellence of NASCAR drivers as they deftly navigate rush hour traffic on both the NJ Turnpike and Washington, DC’s famed Beltway.
Finally, back in the celebrating city of Doha, Qatar, fashion designers unveiled (no pun intended) a dazzling black burqa as official female apparel for World Cup 2022. Now, not only the women of Qatar but every female fan expecting to attend the event can don this chic new cover-up while they brave the Arab Emirate’s blazing sun and average daily temperatures of 118 degrees.
MIKE – thee ultimate talking head on sports!