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The Miami Heat‘s Lebron James, Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh need to quit…while they’re still waaaaaaay behind…that is in NBA fan popularity contests held outside South Florida. Lebron James dubbed the three NBA superstars “the Heatles” after the legendary music group the Beatles because the Heat‘s new No. 6 says, “they sell out arenas wherever they go.” [...] (Satire) Sources close to the King-Without-a-Ring reported that ESPN will devote another hour covering Lebron James’ decision to take his talented flesh to Miami. This time….to get another tattoo. Incredulous at first, ESPN never thought Lebron had enough flesh cap room left on his body to possibly accomodate another tattoo. However, upon further scrutiny, [...] Me, Myself and I were the only people that Lebron James ever cared about. Us, We and Team never factored into Lebron’s decision to forsake his faithful fans and teammates in Cleveland and bolt to the broiling beaches of Miami. Forget about family. Forget about friendship. Forget about fostering hope for a struggling region [...] |
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