Friday Sports Funny: Heavyweight Division in Gymnastics

Heavyweight GymnastsToday’s Friday Sports Funny focuses on the Olympic sport of gymnastics

That’s because the sport confuses me. I’m perplexed.

Why does gymnastics discriminate against bigger boned bodies.

Yes, I’m lamenting why larger ladies and girthier guys who would like to wear leotards are getting shafted.

If boxing and wrestling have a myriad of divisions ranging from pint size featherweights to hulking heavyweights, why can’t the same be true of gymnastics?

Gymnastics Discriminates Against Big People

Gymnastics discriminates against big people. Have you ever seen a gymnast taller than 5 feet or heavier than 100 lbs? Of course not!

Listen to my podcast on the Heavyweight Division in Gymnastics and finish your work week with some clever sports humor. Click on the yellow cover below to hear.

MIKE on sports podcastI say we petition the International Olympic Committee to widen the balance beam, reinforce the parallel bars and prepare the pommel horse for some pretty powerful pounding.

Let’s start making XXXL tutus, or in gymnastics lingo, extremely large leotards instead.

Let’s propose a new heavyweight division in gymnastics. Then, we’ll witness television ratings skyrocketing to Olympic sized proportions.

Imagine eager audiences drooling over the prospects of witnessing a 300 lb. hairy-backed Russian named Boris barrel down the mat to mount the uneven bars.

The giant gymnast would not only test the strength of the balance beam, but he’d also somersault, I mean salto, to seismic shakes in the floor exercises.

The entire arena would tremble from his dramatic dismounts.

Like WWE spectators, a new breed of frenetically frothing gymnastics fans would be born overnight.

High browed gymnastics judges would probably chafe at the audacity of including beefier competitors in such a dainty sport.

However, this once confusing sport would become instantly popular.

A New Heavyweight Division in Gymnastics Would Be Awesome

A new heavyweight division in gymnastics would be awesome.

It would be the next Summer Olympic Games’ heralded perfect 10!

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MIKE – thee ultimate talking head on sports!

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